I can’t shake it tonight

Usually after the kids go to bed my mood lifts a little knowing I don’t have to be “on”.  I feel more calm, the anxiety and stress is bubbling below the surface but I feel a little less edgy.  

Tonight I am anxious.  Tonight I am sad.  So sad.  And I don’t know how to shake it.  I don’t know why I am sad, I just feel like a kid who has lost their favorite toy.  

I know today was stressful, but the overwhelming sadness I feel tonite is disproportionate to the stress of the day. 

I know I come here a lot and just let my feelings out and maybe no one care but I need to sort through them.  I feel like no one understands how I feel.  I feel so alone sometimes even though I am surrounded by people.  

She sits alone 

Her mind races

She is alone

With people surrounding her

People walk by her no one looks her way

She’s invisible because she wants to be.

She has packed on weight 

She knows people think fat is contagious 

A single tear runs down her cheek

Her pain is unbearable.

Author: thethingswehideinside

Im an almost 40 year old mom struggling through this life with two children, a husband, a houseful of animals. We all have mental or physical challenges that make daily life even harder, this is our journey.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s