And The Hits Just Keep on Coming

Hubby went to his PT appointment today, and then he was supposed to see his PCP.  He had called his PCP to tell him that his PT appointment might run over, and the PCP’s office told him that they would make a note and he would be fine.

So 6 visits are paid for by our insurance, then you have to fight for more visits, she told him today that she likes to see some progress after 2 visits, definitely after 3, it was his 4th today,  and she said “I understand if you don’t want to try for more visits, since I am not helping you.  Each time you come in here it’s like you are a brand new patient being evaluated.”  He’s going to try for more visits because it’s not hurting him, but man to be told that…. Hit #1

So he heads over to his PCP and they tell him they can’t see him because he’s too late. He reminds them what was discussed over the phone… too bad, can’t see him till the 9th… he has paperwork for DHHS due tomorrow that the doctor was supposed to be filled out. So he will have to call first thing in the morning for an “acute” appointment, and hopefully it won’t conflict with my appointments with the med doctor and the counselor, and hopefully it’s before his appointment with DHHS. Hit #2

Then we went to see his landlord at his business (who also happens to be a friend of his), to see what the plan was while he was out of work.  The landlord was not very understanding, and told him he would take $50 off the rent. Big whoop, we have no income coming in.  So now, we have to find a way to get everything out of his shop when he can’t lift anything because of his back. And then we have to find a place to store it all. We were pretty sure hubby wasn’t ever going to be able to go back, but he was holding out hope, that maybe he could.  But the landlord made the decision for him. The business is done.  Everything he built is done. The entire reputation he built gone. There’s no way he could find a place with rent that low, and such a good location.  Hit #3.

I really honestly and truly don’t know how much more I can take.  It seems like over the past 4 years our family has suffered more hits than any one family should see. It’s no wonder that my mental health is in the toilet.  Not only do I have a biochemical issue, but I also have situational issues that are causing my depression and anxiety to skyrocket.

I am so tired of it all.  I seriously want to just run away.  Maybe not even alone, maybe I do it with hubby and the kids and we run away where no one can find us. Start over. I don’t even know but I feel so helpless and hopeless.


Author: thethingswehideinside

Im an almost 40 year old mom struggling through this life with two children, a husband, a houseful of animals. We all have mental or physical challenges that make daily life even harder, this is our journey.

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