When you ask someone “how are you doing?” do you want the real answer? The honest answer that might take 10 or 15 minutes of your time, that might bring your day down? Or are you asking just to be polite and want to hear “ok”.
I go back and forth in how I answer people when they ask me how I am doing, because most of the time the answer is “not good”. And if I give them that answer they want me to elaborate. So then we get into the discussion…. But a lot of time I think most people just want to hear “ok” so that we can move on in the conversation, or move on walking away etc.
I often feel like I am lying when I say “ok” but I can tell that’s what they want to hear.
So here’s a follow up question- why do we ask “how are you?” if we don’t really want to know? Wouldn’t it be better to just say hello? or hi there I hope you are well. Feed them the answer you want to hear?
What made me think about this was that they other day I posted an article on facebook about OCD with a little blurb of an explanation, and there was not one comment or like on that article. People don’t really want to know what I am going through, what I am feeling. People who tell me “if there’s anything you need” – I don’t think many of them actually mean it. So why do they say it?
Just thoughts on a Sunday night.