I’m a bad Christian

I say that I’m bad Christian because when times get tough we’re supposed to turn to Christ for strength, we’re supposed to let him carry our burdens.  But I don’t. I brood. I get anxious. I get angry. I get frustrated.  I get depressed. 

Tonight I scratched- found that a safety pin does the job way better than keys. I did both sides of both arms and on the inside of my right arm I scratched Just Like Him. 

I feel like all these feelings are going to make me just like my dad.  I won’t let it happen. I won’t. 

I know I need to pray.  I know I need Jesus, but I feel like I’m Peter sinking in the waves because my eyes are off Jesus. I need prayers.  I need to focus on Him and not on the crap around me. 

Author: thethingswehideinside

Im an almost 40 year old mom struggling through this life with two children, a husband, a houseful of animals. We all have mental or physical challenges that make daily life even harder, this is our journey.

One thought on “I’m a bad Christian”

  1. I relate to you completely with this 😞 Be sure to keep in mind that God didn’t make us all to be perfect, and each person’s spiritual walk is different! As long as you keep faith and remember He is with you, that is more than enough. Best wishes to you 😊

    Like

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