He isn’t all bad OR how positive words can come back to haunt me later…

I have said A LOT of negative things about my father, but, he always always approved of our homeschooling.  He was the only one in our family that did. Over the phone he would often tell me how good I was doing with the kids, and how I was giving them so much more than any school public or private could.

And part of me feels like I am disappointing him- but yet again, by throwing in the towel on homeschooling (at least for now)

But maybe I can look at it that I AM giving them more, because right now I CAN’T offer them more.

I don’t know, maybe I am doing this for me.  Maybe this is selfish and I am doing it to make my life easier.  To give me a break, and some time away.

But maybe that time away will be better for them.  I don’t know.  I am just going around and around in circles wth my thinking.  And I can’t stop thinking about it. Nothing takes my mind off of it. I am just at a loss.

Homeschooling mom has been my title for 5 years. What am I when both kids are in school? And because of my depression I just sit around all day?

I am just so confused and sad.

Author: thethingswehideinside

Im an almost 40 year old mom struggling through this life with two children, a husband, a houseful of animals. We all have mental or physical challenges that make daily life even harder, this is our journey.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s